The Pressure to Be Perfect + Why I've Been MIA.

Am I… Are we… Back with the weekly blogs again?!

Hi my love. It's been a friggin minute, hasn't it?

It feels like you're a close friend I haven't talked to in a while, so I feel called to explain myself a little. So, let me tell you why I've been MIA.

I've been going back and forth on (a cute way of saying “been having a lot of anxiety around”) how I want to show up online. Which, must seem SO silly to anyone who's business doesn't require them to be on social media, I get that. For those of us whose business IS to show up online, you might relate. There's a strange line it feels like you have to walk, and I can “kinda” whittle it down to this: Do I keep it strictly business, or do I share my personal life? I've seen people do both, and be successful at… both. I however have always struggled with where I fall.

Here's the thing,

I'm kind of a “my mess is my message," coach.

(which is very true for most coaches in the health and wellness field tbh).

When I go through shit and come out on the other end, you get the best of my struggles = my lessons 😂 Lucky you, lol.

I truly believe that my education and professional background only serve as the groundwork of what I do. My personal journey and my life experience is what ultimately gives me the unique understanding and ability to deeply empathize with my clients and their challenges when it comes to their relationship with food, fitness, and themselves. Because I’ve been there. I know their struggles. I know their thoughts. I’ve felt their feelings. 

This is what I am truly proud of, and what makes me the coach I am today and why my clients trust me to guide them to living their healthiest and happiest lives.

It's also what makes showing up online insanely difficult (that and my perfectionist tendencies which I won't get into today, but just know I am constantly typing and deleting lol). I don't want to just throw information at you and add to the noise. I also don't want to be inauthentic and lead you to believe it's always sunshine and roses, because it's not. No one has it all figured out, no one, and there's a beauty in being vulnerable and sharing those struggles. Something I want to encourage you to do… Ask for help when you need it, and stop answering people that ask, “How are you," with “I'm good,” if you're not. It's an opportunity, and invitation to connect.

It reminds YOU that perfection doesn't exist, and it's NOT the goal.

Not everyone works out (or feels like working out) every day.

Not everyone eats perfectly healthy 24/7.

Not everyone's relationship is smooth sailing.

Not everyone is happy all the time.

Talk about taking the pressure OFF and allowing yourself to be freaking human.

“It is only through being extremely self-loving that you can allow yourself to fumble through mistakes."

Hence why self-love is such an important practice.

Here's the thing, in a world where coaches and influencers are seen as the “end goal,” (i.e. we think if we do “x” person's workout we'll be as skinny as them, or if we eat like “x” we'll be as happy and carefree as them, or if we complete “x” person's course we too will be rich enough to travel the world like them and all our problems will go away) it's hard to not feel the pressure to be perfect and happy all the time. It's literally what sells. So, when I'm not feeling my best, it feels really hard to put on a face and show up online. And maybe that's unprofessional, or maybe I'm paving a new path because being “professional” is overrated and people want genuine authenticity now-a-days, I haven't figured it out yet.

I can confidently say that this past year has been one of the hardest years of my life. I mean, fuck man. But I know what I'm learning and working through is going to have the most positive impact on not just myself, but my clients. Because that's the kind of coach I am. 

So, that's where my mind has been at lately. 

Me not showing up, isn't an indicator of how little I care, it's actually the opposite, I care A LOT. I don't want to just add to the noise, I want to help. Which in 1:1 coaching sessions, I know how to do, and well. But in an online world where we overcomplicate the “what” and oversimplify the “how” we're inundated with information with no implementation - which creates frustration and hopelessness. Something to think about… How much more information do you really need, and can you maybe focus on implementing what you already know? If you need guidance, that's literally what I do (you can apply here for coaching).

Ok, so I'm still not 100% what this means in terms of my showing up online, but I have been feeling called to start my newsletter/blog again (and maybe podcast). Will it be weekly? Will it be bi-weekly? I'm not entirely sure. I'm surrendering to “imperfect action." Something I encourage you to do as well… What have you been putting off that you take one small step towards today? Feel free to respond in the comments :)