“Negative Visualization” for Gratitude

One day will be the last day you…

hug that person.

hike your favorite trail.

kiss them.

bike that street with your friend.

hear their laughter.

have all that free time.

sleep in your childhood home.

I know… I know, I'm sorry. Did I make you sad?

Good.

because I want to make a point.

These are the reasons why mindfulness and gratitude are important practices.

and 2025 is a great year to start practicing them if you don't already.

The intention here isn't to make you feel like sh*t.

This is ACTUALLY a method of practicing gratitude called, “Negative Visualization." 

It's a tool rooted in Stoic philosophy – a way to imagine life without the things and people you love, not to dwell on it and be sad, but to help you appreciate the presence of these things while they're there.

It might feel counterintuitive, but psychology tells us that we're naturally prone to something called hedonic adaptation. For example, I was recently in Sedona, Arizona (SUCH a gorgeous place I highly recommend you visit) and I asked someone who lives there if they are as amazed by it's beauty as I am, and they said, “You kind of get used to it to be honest, but it's nice to be able to experience it again for the first time through someone else's eyes.” Hedonic adaptation is when you initially get a boost of happiness by something new, but over time, you adapt to the change, and your level of happiness stabilizes back to its baseline and you start to take it for granted. Kind of like when you get a new phone.

We can interrupt this cycle by envisioning the absence of this thing or person to reignite their value. Doing this can help us savor life a little more fully, and make every day moments – like sharing a meal with someone special or walking down your street – feel extraordinary.

How To Practice:

Identify What You Value: Start by choosing a person, thing, or experience that brings you joy. It could be your dog waking you up, your morning coffee, or even your ability to go for a walk in your neighborhood.

Imagine Its Absence: Now, picture your life without it. Imagine waking up and realizing it’s no longer there. How would its absence affect your daily life? What would you miss most? What would you wish you could do one more time?

Focus on the Present: After sitting with this imagined loss, shift your attention back to the present moment where this person, thing, or experience still exists. Notice the gratitude that wells up as you appreciate its presence more deeply.

Examples:

Relationship: Imagine the last time you felt your partner in bed by your side. What if it was the last time? How much more deeply might you savor the next time you're there. 

Health: Envision a day when your body feels too tired to move. Can you appreciate the strength it takes to carry you through a workout or a walk today?

Conveniences: Picture life without electricity, running water, or internet. Flipping a switch to see at night and connecting to Wi-Fi feel like small miracles huh?

So, if you want to start practicing gratitude and mindfulness… which, with studies showing it can do this:

👉🏻 Boost mental health
👉🏻 Improve sleep
👉🏻 Increase resilience
👉🏻 Increase life satisfaction
👉🏻 Improve physical health
👉🏻 Strengthen relationships

…why wouldn't you?

Try practicing Negative Visualization!

It's a method I use with my clients (with great success) when they have a hard time thinking about things to be grateful for (which, during hard times, can feel difficult to do, I get it).

Sometimes the best way to love what you have is to imagine what it’d be like to lose it.